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I see that you're reading. Whom?
Hume.
Humorous?
Not him. If you're looking for laughs from Hume, you'll find a vacuum.
So, his work was just kind of ho-hume?
No. Actually, he was a pretty interesting 18th century philosopher. An empiricist skeptical of the existence of innate ideas. You could almost say he was a precursor of contemporary cognitive science. Big thinker. In fact, humongous.
Is it from Hume we get the CIA word "Hum-int"?
I doubt it. I do know that he believed that desire rather than reason governs our behavior. He thought that was just the nature of being human.
When we study him, are we studying humanism?
Well, indirectly, echoically, yes. And certainly he was a humanitarian.
So he believed in humankind and was a kind human?
Yes. But I believe that he wanted to see humans develop. I think he would have been open to the idea of human engineering, to the prospects of the Human Genome Project, and to the possibility of eliminating the virus of human immunodeficiency.
And would he have looked benignly on the development of humanoids?
I think he would have. I don't think he believed in speciesism. He didn't have that kind of humebris.
What about humosexuality?
I think he would have tolerated it. He was humane.
So it was not in his nature to humiliate?
Not at all. He was quite humeble.
Did he have anything to do with the invention of humulin?
No, that's of quite recent origin. Nor, although he sweated from it just as you and I do, did he coin the term "humiture."
Well, anyway, he sounds like quite a guy. Did he ever make a mistake? You know, a real humedinger?
Sure. One time he got mixed up and said "Errara est humanum."
Wow, that is a bonehead Latin 1 mistake! Embarrassing. So did he have a sense of humor?
Almost by definition. Once, while smoking a cigar, he regaled his friends with an account of how he clumsily fell and broke his humerus.
That's a knee-slapper, all right! By the way, did he keep his cigars in a humidor?
He did. And because of a bronchial condition, whenever he smoked he had to resort to the use of a humidifier.
Was he musical? Did he play an instrument. Or would he just hume?
Mostly just humed his favorite tune, which was "Humoresque."
You said he lived in the 18th century? So by now he's just humus?
Yes, he and the earth by now are probably well humogenized.
So there's no chance of retrieving his DNA? Although he's the ex-Hume, it's too late for him to be exhumed?
Yes, I'm afraid he's been atomized by the bugs and the humebugs. The bell has tolled for Hume.
*****
Here's a little puzzle asking you to combine two fairly well-known movie titles that fit a brief description of a hybrid film. For example, the title for one that features Daniel Day Lewis as a physically-challenged youth growing up in a coal-mining town that forbids dancing would be My Left Footloose. The descriptions come first, followed by all the movie titles used in the puzzle, just in case you need a few hints. The answers appear at the end.
1. A crazed nuclear weapons scientist exults over the glories of romance.
2. A couple on the verge of breaking up find themselves on the pathway to hell.
3. Cattle drivers John Wayne and Montgomery Clift find themselves on a one-way river trip.
4. A coal-mining family goes to Broadway to see young actresses trying to become stars.
5. A case of mistaken identity desperately seeks a transcontinental shortcut to escape pursuers.
6. A pampered socialite falls in love with a roguish reporter who takes her to a performance of Pagliacci.
7. A handicapped war veteran steps off a train and meets Bill Haley and the Comets.
8. An alien experiences first love.
9. A newspaper mogul finds his subordinates rebelling against him.
10. A musical comedy about an idiot savant.
11. Guys impersonate girls in satire on fighter pilots.
12. Brando's animal magnetism disrupts life on a New England farm.
13. An animated version of a female's amorous adventures.
14. Chapter in Star Wars saga features time-travelling in a De Lorean.
15. Mel Gibson plays a deaf mute warrior who meets a young girl.
16. Private eye Bogey pursues two young guys who sell U.S. security secrets to the Soviet Union.
17. A testy jury expands duties to include monitoring all alien activity on planet earth.
18. Civil War plantation invaded by a rat, a mole, a toad, and a badger.
19. A recurring motif of red rose petals runs through this transformation of animal into prince.
20. A spin doctor creates a fake war in a rural English village where men assault his wife.
21. An atavistic dog learns to live off the land in Sweden.
22. Again and again a hitman relives his assassination attempts.
23. A pregnant Mia Farrow, fearing that her husband has forced her to become impregnated by Satan-worshippers, seeks revenge in the boxing ring.
24.Francophile screenwriter meets up with two expatriate jazz musicians.
25. Huge soft kid learns to play tough football but has a secret romantic attraction to the California wine country.
Choose from these: Dr. Strangelove, A Streetcar Named Desire, E.T., Some Like It Hot, Toy Story, Men in Black, Back to the Future, Beauty and the Beast, The Caine Mutiny, The Falcon and the Snowman, Million Dollar Baby, Wild Strawberries, Groundhog Day, Paris Blues, Rain Man, Desire Under the Elms, The Story of O, 12 Angry Men, A Night at the Opera, Love is a Many Splendored Thing, River of No Return, Gone With the Wind, The Valley of the Dolls, Northwest Passage, Hot Shots, Singin' in the Rain, The Maltese Falcon, The Empire Strikes Back, Braveheart, Wag the Dog, The Call of the Wild, The Day of the Jackal, Rosemary's Baby, Sideways, The Wind in the Willows, It Happened One Night, Rock Around the Clock, Tea and Sympathy, Red River, Citizen Kane, American Beauty, North by Northwest, Straw Dogs, Midnight in Paris, The Road to Perdition, Bad Day at Black Rock, The Blindside, Two for the Road, How Green Was my Valley, Back to the Future, The Heart is a Lonely Hunter
Answers:
1. Dr. Strangelove Is a Many-Splendored Thing
2. Two for the Road to Perdition
3. Red River of No Return
4. How Green Was My Valley of the Dolls
5. North by Northwest Passage
6. It Happened One Night at the Opera
7. Bad Day at Black Rock Around the Clock
8. E.T. and Sympathy
9. Citizen Kane Mutiny
10. Singin' in the Rain, Man
11. Some Like it Hot Shots
12. A Streetcar Named Desire Under the Elms
13. Toy Story of O
14. The Empire Strikes Back to the Future
15. Braveheart Is a Lonely Hunter
16. The Maltese Falcon and the Snowman
17. 12 Angry Men in Black
18. Gone With the Wind in the Willows
19.American Beauty and the Beast
20. Wag the Straw Dogs
21. The Call of the Wild Strawberries
22. Groundhog Day of the Jackal
23. Rosemary's Million Dollar Baby
24. Midnight in Paris Blues
25. The Blind Sideways
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